I did not strike back at all not a finger was raised. I chose instead to stand to attention hands in the “nao re”  or some people call it the “osu” position while i took shots the head and chest. By which time i saw 4 bouncers behind me. My cousin then explained that he knew that if i decided to attack my drunken “friend” I’d be debt paying off his hospital bill. Needless to say, after that incident, i trained harder and fiercer and i then realise that it was because of rage that i trained so hard. Kyokushin helped me there, i remembered the “refrain” from violence bit of the dojokun. And i guess it saved my life. Well most probably his. Because when i see him, sometimes i still imagine that ill be tearing to shreds. Needless to say, he never brings up that incident and has a fear that one day i will exact my revenge.

Buddy, don’t worry if i ever rip you to shreds, it’ll be in a ring, and octagon or in my dojo.

OSU!

So we can start work at 9
Finish at 5 or 6.
Because Dinner is only at 8 or 9 we have that extra 2 or 3 hours to get our stuff done and still get enough sleep.

Anyway I digress. Over the course of the last 2 months, I’ve been extremely busy with work and other business commitments. This requires me to work late and travel. It disrupts not just my daily life but my training too. In spite of this, i still do my best to turn up to training. Late or not. I’d say better late than never, although its becoming increasingly difficult to even make it. So what i actually do is i train in the mornings before work. I run and i do some weights or i do regular calisthenics before bed. I actually do feel stronger. With a tournament looming in September, I’ve also taken to do some training in MMA gyms when i can, well not just for the tournament but also because of regular interests. To that end, i get the full effects of circuit and anaerobic exercises. The results have been astounding. I used to get tired so easily while sparring due to the lay offs ive had, but recently i feel that i could go on and on.

We are family: on Kohais and Seniors

Anyway 2 days ago, we had our grading. As usual, it never gets any easier. Sure you begin to know how its supposed to be, but you never know how its going to turn out especially when it comes to kumite. The truth is, my current batch of kohais (those who train with me at the same or similar levels) are excellent. Law for example is the epitome of Age is just a number and that i’ll give 100% even with a broken arm and of course he has maturity the only good thing about age (although not all people get it as they age.) Then there’s Albert. The B.F.G or sometimes i refer to him as thomas the “tank” engine. Not just because hes like a tank, but he tries, and he practices. All 3 of us have an unspoken respect for each other. Its mutual. Sometimes during kumite we give as much as we think is necessary because we don’t want to hurt each other. That said, we give 100% all the time and we fight with our hearts. It always ends so naturally not just with a hand shake but with a hug and a huge pat on the back because training means that much to us and our friendships and growing as a group too. We have good seniors to thank, but as we move further up, we find that our seniors are slowly becoming kohais. One day only Shihan and Sensei would be left!

Grading: General

This grading was special because it was reminiscent of my first test. I was a white belt then and put up for the first time for kumite during a grading against an orange senior going for blue. We didnt really fight hard because i learnt my lesson during class. You fight hard with the seniors they will hit back and they will retaliate. I’ve experienced this first hand from getting knocked down to heavy bruising to bleeding. My white belt still bears the stains. Anyway, I didn’t really fight hard with Steve, but out of reflexes and fluke I raised my right leg and kicked him in the head near the ear. Needless to say the fight ended and I felt terrible but I knew that it was a fluke, he knew it, Shihan knew it as did the seniors. I was congratulated but like i always say to the juniors under my care and charge as well as my friends: “The notion and the idea of knocking someone out is great. The execution and actually doing it however, isn’t so great.” Why? because unless you are inherently sadistic or an asshole, there is never any pleasure in administering hurt to another individual, whether or not it is for sport, for fun or for training.

Grading: Bloody sunday

On Sunday, I knocked down a white belt. He was smaller than I am and younger. I felt terrible in the beginning because i had knocked down and inferior opponent. I went home an analysed this for hours, looking at the video, and trying to recall what happened. It dawned on me, that I now know how the seniors felt when they knocked me down when i was given kicks in the head and when they came to me and asked; “are you okay?” “Can you hear?” I used to think maybe they just felt sorry for me, but now i know there is genuine remorse. Should I have felt this way? I know Shihan and the rest just thought it was very methodical, clinical and just so professional and unemotional. But when that kick went up and struck him I didnt know quite how to handle it. Although at that point, I did pull back the kick. I thought to myself “imagine if i didnt?”

I felt awful right up to the point when i saw the video and I saw his reactions to getting hit. That was when i realised he deserved it.
What do you expect? For 30 seconds i literally did not hit back, until i received groin kicks and kicks far too close to my neck. And that smirk. Oh i cannot stand arrogance. I snapped and I went for him and if you watched the video I only hit him 4 times. Twice in the leg once in the stomach and once in the head. I admire his spirit. Sure. But no neck punching or groin kicking please. So how did he get kicked in the head? His hands were down and he stuck his head out. It was a split second reaction and i hit him.

I felt so bad about it until my family and my girlfriend reviewed the video. She said he deserved it for fighting like an animal. Yes i said but hes still a kid, then my dad said, yup I beat you as a kid to stop you from being an asshole. Its better that you did it than someone else. It all makes sense in some tragic way. I wish it never has to be this way, but I hope it becomes positive for him. If he puts in all the training, and fights hard all in the hopes of one day returning the favour to me, I would happily stick my head out let him kick it and go down with a smile on my face knowing that sometimes, a kick in the head does wonders.

Until then keep training. Keep pushing and keep doing your absolute best.

Osu no seishin.

When i first started blogging about Karate, I found that there were many like minded people, all of whom were interested in Martial arts at one stage but slowly fizzled out. I myself can say with complete honesty that sometimes I am too tired to train by the time I finish work if i even get the chance to train at all on some days. Anyway I know that title is a little vague o but I hope you’d share my sentiments if we were to explore this further.

First, some facts: Did you know that the sale of footballs and other football related paraphernalia are at their highest during the world cup or any similar large televised global event? Similarly did you know that Martial arts sign ups always increase  when a film is out? Ah! Now you get where i’m coming from. Our class gets smaller an smaller, only the ones really in love with Kyokushin stay. Some come for completely the wrong reason. I have made it my resolve never to hold back anymore when someone tries to hurt me in class, and while it compromises a little on “we shall refrain from violence” and a little bit of ethics here, it is just as well. I’d rather not walk out with a torn ACL or broken nose.

I now fully understand why it is difficult to sustain enthusiasm for something, its not the environment, its not the class or the people, its the circumstances and the fact that real life impinges so much on what you love that there is a constant battle to balance responsibility and personal fulfillment. The struggle to be happy is one that we fight everyday, but really i remember once being told that satisfaction equals true happiness, and yet while happiness leaves your head in the cloud momentarily, satisfaction like good wine lingers in your palette far longer than just a ‘brief moment’ of blissful indulgence. It is however said that satisfaction also fuels greed because satisfaction is like a bottomless pit, on the one hand fulfillment and contentment is achieved but at the same time levels of satisfaction become harder to achieve each and every time.
We often then mistake satisfaction as a benchmark vanilla feeling, and I think Sophia Tolstoy (for those who don’t know she’s Leo Tolstoy’s wife) put it best “I am a source of satisfaction to him, a nurse, a piece of furniture, a woman – nothing more”. Its always easy therefore to take satisfaction for granted, and in doing so one realises that when happiness is temporary, short-lived and so often too taken for granted.

We as human beings experience many things in this life time, one new experience often begets another, one emotion separating an incident or traumatic circumstance. And yet as we go through several cathartic phases in life moving forward and soldiering on, we soon find that through the icy depths of winter, in the darkest corners where we least expect to find salvation, we come out resolute and renewed.

Osu no seishin.

Did you know that Malaysia is so multi cultural that people can say racist things on, oh I don’t know a not so well known news network like Al Jazeera? Or that by virtue of  ethnicity be denied access to certain facilities or certain privileges? That despite the successes of certain members of society, you can be blamed for being a little to successful! Then just yesterday what struck me most and was  last the straw that broke the horse’s back  was my discovery that what i had thought about a school Silat was all wrong. I was told that I couldn’t join certain schools of silat because i wasn’t a muslim. But imagine my sadness when i learnt that a friend of mine, who isn’t muslim, isn’t Malaysian, and not even of asian decent was given the privilege to train in this form of silat.

It seems that we if born of a minority can be made to be more worthless than that of foreigners even though we are citizens by birth. Doesn’t that make you just feel so sad?

In the context of abuse, a teacher who realises a student worships him and is unquestionably in awe of him or her is in a position of great influence and power. It is here that the student is incredibly vulnerable. Martial arts occupies a space much like religion, where the teacher has his/her followers and instructs them in ways of philosophy and the martial arts. Fortunately however this is where the similarities end. In religion, ones belief ties them to God and omnipotent being that, whose works are often unworldly. The teacher however is but a human being just like the students themselves. And while the teacher’s words can be taken as law in the dojo or school, outside of it things must resume as they were in a contextual sense. While some may argue that what they learnt in martial arts ultimately influenced their perceptions of life and how they lived theirs, I am arguing that there must be adequate separation.

In a few cases students who worshiped their teachers were often taken advantage of and it then changes the dynamics of a student teacher relationship. It must be remembered that the teacher needs the student as much as the student needs the teacher. A student owes nothing to the school because martial arts must be learnt and taught voluntarily. A student from an economics standpoint, pays his fees, respects and is loyal to his teacher and that is all that should be expected of this relationship. Outside of the dojo, a relationship amongst equals can be pursued where in one context we can illustrate this by saying “my teacher is also my drinking buddy who gets as drunk as i do!”

Here is a quick summary.

Teacher Worship -
1) I don’t question my teacher at all
2) The fact that i get to train here is a great honor
3) My teacher gives me advice  about my profession. I take it to heart
4) I do everything my teacher asks of me, no questions asked.

Teacher respect -
1) I question my teacher when I am unsure
2) I am happy to train here.
3) I listen to my teacher’s advice about my profession where applicable. However, i  always remember that I am a trained Doctor and he isn’t.
4) I try to help where i can and if it does not jeopardize my priorities.

There are lots of differences and similarities too in the approach. But at the end of the day its a two way understanding.

As for me, the only form of worship should be in places of worship. A dojo is not a place of worship. If it becomes one you should seriously start considering your options and walk away.

Osu.

The next thing i want to bring up is the fact that people are far too “non-confrontational” these days. I appreciate it a lot if I have/had done something not quite right that someone pulls me a side and tells me to my face and not bitch about me through proxy. I also despise the fact a rallying cry for support is used to brain wash people to see things their way. It makes people who want to do the right thing and who are inherently straightforward just afraid to come out and be counted.

I read something today that really struck a chord. “It’s easy for someone to take a Pot shot at you. Its hard though, not to take it personally.”

Think about that for second.

My next post “Sensei/Teacher respect, vs. Sensei Worship” – i read something similar a while back but this is my take on it. Ill highlight the differences etc. Stay tuned.

Same bat time, same bat channel.

I think in order for karatekas to know who they are and to know why they train, they need to look deep within, take a deep breath, exhale and ask themselves honestly and humbly, just what it means to be a karateka.
I can assure you, its not how powerful your kicks or punhces are or how many bones you’ve broken or how well you perform kata. It’s oh so much more than that.

Osu.

I bring this up not because I believe in buying loyalty nor do I believe that loyalty and allegiance should be a tangible commodity that can be bought and moved about in the capital market, but I refer to Loyalty as a value. I value loyalty in a person, it usually showcases a person’s character, one who is steadfast, trustworthy and unwavering in support come hell or high waters. A loyal friend is one you would like by your bedside on your dying day, or by your side when fighting a war. You cannot possibly place value on it likewise, a person who has betrayed you for monetary or because circumstances make it an easy choice is not someone you want to readily re invite into your inner circles, regardless of how many years you have known that said person. As I wrote in my previous posts, integrity, manners and loyalty are what I value most.

Contrast this with a person who has seen you at your worst and your best, who has been there more often when you are down than you are up, a person who has been infallible in their support. Its usually easier to take this person for granted. Just like how its always easy to get mad at your sister, mother, father, brother, wife or best friend because you know that they will never leave you. As unlikely as it is there will come a day when this support disappears completely, because unlike flip floppers and people with no real loyalties, those most loyal to you are often those who can leave you permanently without batting so much of an eyelid. Because when you give someone so loyal to you a reason to leave, it usually means they have had enough.

People want to be treated justly, and people want to be treated the way they treat another, for example I saw this when i was googling strongest man competitions. The question came “Which race of people is the strongest?” very few answers addressed the question seriously, one individual’s answer however stood out when that said individual answered  The Aryan race”. He followed up by saying something like  ”Ask a stupid question that has an inclination towards racism and you’ll get a racist answer”. Same thing, use “f**k” in a sentence when talking to me, and that usually sets the tone of the conversation.

Loyalty… who can really say they are loyal? Not many. Not many can even attempt to be true to Kyokushin or Sosai why? Because sometimes it gains you nothing.

It becomes  increasingly difficult to justify and explain  just how hard it is to keep a good karate class going. There is often that balance of growing classes and maintaing them v.s the nurturing of your current stable of students. As long as I’ve been here in Kyokushin, this post on loyalty is far reaching and strikes a chord within the whole Kyokushin structure, because as one soon finds out, there is a price on everything. Loyalty, love and even life itself.

The thing is though, a long with training on Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, I have to fit in time to complete 2 super circuits.
Which includes:

10 sets and the number of reps as follows  - 20, 18, 16, 14, 12, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2
1) Kettlebell/dumbell swings
2) Standing shoulder presses
3) Reverse dips
4) Normal width Pushups
5) Inverted smith machine rows.

This must be done within 20 minutes.

Followed by
100 Sit ups
50 Leg rises
50 wide grip pushups
5 sets of 10 Bench press.

This is to be done with 20 minutes also.

And this is only week 1 – 4 with some sets mixed around. My crossfit routine hasn’t even officially begun.

Osu!

Osu!